Convenient miracle.
Apr. 12th, 2007 11:10 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
keire_keDone with the evil that is the dentist for a while. Wheeee! I hate my teeth with a passion.
It seemed to be almost as cold inside as it was outside, and given that they were in space, it was pretty goddamn cold. Breathing was noticeably more difficult, even now. No one struggled yet, but there was a difference. Sanzo finally relented an fetched himself another sweater, and a couple of heavy blankets, one to dump on the moron still sleeping on his bed, and the other to bundle Kouryuu up. The cat didn’t struggle when he wrapped the thick material around him. This, if nothing else, finally drove the point home: they were going to die, and there was nothing he could do. If his insane kitten was allowing himself to be handled like a newborn, all hope had to be lost.
Sanzo snorted. He scratched Kouryuu’s ears lightly as he walked to the common area, where the lot of them had gathered to hear the last words, and threw the meowing bundle into Lirin’s arms. Idiot cat.
“Do we know how much air we have left?” he asked turning to Yaone.
“Five to six hours,” she answered worrying a datapad in her hands. A string of callous calculations shone dimly between her fingers. “A little more in the shuttles, but not much. An hour more, maybe. If we separate.”
“Why can’t we use the shuttles to go somewhere?” Gojyo asked. For once he was serious, though it was hard not to be, when confronted with the perspective of slowly asphyxiating to death in a freezer. His arms were crossed against his chest, hands hidden in too long sleeves. The too-big sweater had to belong to Jien – as much as everything about Gojyo annoyed Sanzo, he knew the certified companion didn’t have colourless, shapeless pieces of clothing in his wardrobe. Stupid of him, really, since these were usually warmest.
“Shuttles aren’t like a ship,” Jien told him. “They only use the air West produces. And they don’t have enough power to get anyone anywhere, from here. Not enough to get help.”
“Cheerful. So, what’s the plan?”
“I would recommend praying,” Sanzo said, leaning against the wall. He was aching for a cigarette even more than usual, which was only reasonable since now more than ever he couldn’t have one. “But that never helps. Our best chance is to get onto the shuttles, fly off, and try to signal from there. How much fuel do the shuttles have, anyway?”
“Not much. Or- at all. I had to use it up to keep the computers running,” Lirin said. She was looking at the floor, clutching Kouryuu to her chest. “A little of West’s fuel went with the blow, not much, but the fuel lines are jammed.” Her voice was steady, but there was a hint of tears close to the surface.
Sanzo reached out and slid his hand through her hair, fast enough to make it seem like a whack. He didn’t fool anyone. “Sucks to be us,” he said. “At least we can send a message.” Lirin curled in on herself some more. “Is the damage repairable?”
“Oh, yes,” Lirin nodded quickly. “Didn’t damage nothing. Not much. I can have her running in a couple of hours, if I get the parts.”
Sanzo nodded at her and turned to Gojyo. “Gojyo, you weren’t in your shuttle just now?” Seeing the red-head shake his head Sanzo went on, “The air supply should be relatively unaffected. And, it ought to be warmer. Give it another couple of hours here and move to the shuttles. Three in each, arrange yourselves to your hearts’ content.”
That got him universal attention.
“Three? Who are we supposed to leave?” Lirin was looking at him with wide, frightened eyes.
Sanzo shrugged. “Me, obviously. Ship is mine and I’m keeping it.”
“So, am I officially captain then?” Kougaji asked, laying a hand on Yaone’s shoulder.
“Are you fucking kidding?” Sanzo had a very definite opinion on many a subject. His unquestioned captaincy was chief among them.
“I’m shocked. Whatever happened to ‘if I die, you’re the captain of this boat’, captain?” Kougaji asked, his face perfectly straight.
Sanzo gave him a look. “Did I at any point imply that as an option? Ever? I die, you launch her and blow her to pieces.”
Kougaji allowed a low chuckle to escape his mouth. “So who’s the other lucky person?” he asked calmly.
“Goku.” Sanzo’s sharp eyes found Hakkai’s expression most interesting.
“I really must protest,” the good doctor said, perfectly calm. He was sitting beside Gojyo, prim and proper, as if it was another safety lecture and not their final moments. He even managed to make a blanket around his shoulders look dignifying.
“Protest all you want, but I will knock you out if you end up using too much air.”
“Goku is my responsibility.”
“He is also unconscious and ill.” Hakkai opened his mouth, but Sanzo didn’t allow him to speak. “This is not open for debate. You’re going. He’s staying.” The underlining threat was very clear. Besides, Hakkai must have realised that, being unconscious, Goku would last longer than Sanzo, possibly longer than any of them. But he must have realised that better than anyone, Sanzo thought uncharitably. No better endurance training than training with reduced oxygen levels.
“You know, if you wanted to get the kid alone, it’s not like we were particularly keen on getting in your way, Sanzo.” Gojyo pulled another of his knowing smiles from his endless arsenal onto his face.
“Fuck off,” Sanzo said without much spite. Everyone smiled, however thinly, which raised his hackles a little. He was not a travelling show.
“Just stating the obvious.”
Sanzo turned his back to him. “Don’t waste air talking. Make yourselves useful. Yaone, you try and push the signal as far as you can. Lirin, you make sure nothing else blows.” He ignored the faint “nothing left to explode”. “And I want the list of people who sold us the faulty parts, as I am gonna kill them, as soon as I can. Hakkai, you see to Lirin and Goku.”
“Not much else I can do for either. Lirin will be fine. The burns are superficial,” the doctor said in that cool, collected tone of his. “Goku, I can frankly say I have no idea where to start.”
Sanzo gave Lirin a sceptic look. She smiled at him. The red smudges on her face stood out, despite her tanned skin, yet she didn’t seem to be in any pain. The marks glistened in the low light, radiating faint smell of ointment. “You look after Kouryuu,” he said to her. “Something happens to him, I’m gonna kill you dead.”
The young mechanic pouted. “Why me?” she whined, tugging the blanket around the cat so that the blanket kept the cold out and the claws in.
“See, I told you he was being too nice. Never accept candy from him ever again,” Kougaji told Lirin seriously.
“Sanzo, you bastard!” she cried.
Sanzo smirked, but the smirk disappeared soon enough. “Why are you lot still here? Get!”
Gojyo stood up. “What do I do?”
“You might want to join Kou and Jien in prayer, for all I care.” Sanzo turned around. “Shuttle lock up in two hours, starting now. You might want to start drawing lots.”
“Sanzo…” Kougaji started and fell silent.
“I gave you an order.” His mouth twisted in a smirk. “On your knees and pray. Try to minimise the amount of air you use.” The captain gave his crew one last look. Slowly, they started to drift out of the common area. Within minutes Sanzo was alone. He dropped to the couch and closed his eyes.
“Fuck you,” he said to the universe.
The two hour mark came and went. Sanzo, with his inborn tact and sentimentality, locked the shuttle doors behind his crew and went to his cabin. Goku was still sleeping soundly, just as he had three minutes previously, when Hakkai was persuaded to retreat to Gojyo’s shuttle with Jien. Sanzo stood over his occupied bed for a few moments. The monkey didn’t so much as stir.
The captain snorted at his own idiocy and returned to the common area. He poured himself a glass of whiskey and gulped it down. Calmer now, he settled on the couch again, bottle and glass in hand.
The signal was out. All that remained was to wait for a convenient miracle to pick it up.
xxx.XXX.xxx
Sanzo opened his eyes. It took much effort and the results were less than satisfying. There was an indefinable haze in his line of vision. He swatted at it, impatiently – he didn’t have time for bullshit, or weakness.
“Relax, dude,” the blur said. There was a hint of amusement in the almost disembodied voice. “You have until you can stand up on your own, I suggest you put the time to good use.”
Sanzo knew that voice. He also knew the voice shouldn’t be anywhere near him. He had trouble picking the reasons from the muddled depths of his brain, but he knew that much.
“The fuck?” he managed, proud when the words emerged without a slur.
“You’ll be groggy for a while. No offence, but West was a regular greenhouse. You oughta had some plants installed, maybe you’d have some oxygen then. I personally think a fern on the bridge would improve your feng shui.”
He remembered now why the voice shouldn’t be anywhere near him. It provoked violence.
“Duo. What the fuck?” The haze was dissolving, leaving behind a headache, a grinning face and a very familiar infirmary. He was flat on his back, maybe a meter above the floor. There was a transparent mask on his face. He took a deep breath and tore it off. Very carefully he let the air out, and breathed in.
Air. Oxygen. Miracles did happen.
“So glad you remember me, captain. I just saved your sorry ass. What’s my prize?”
“Keeping your teeth.” Tentatively, but making an effort to appear as though he wasn’t trying to be careful, Sanzo sat up. “Shit.”
“You were badly fucked. I got the engine fixed – some luck there, at least. I had a spare converter and an expansion valve. Fuel lines were fried, Lirin and I fixed them up real nice. I’ll send you my half of the bill,” Duo said, handing Sanzo a chocolate bar and a couple of pills. “Have some chocolate with your aspirin, it’d do you good. You look like you went skiing in Hell.”
“Fuck you.”
“Thanks for the offer, but no.” Again with the infuriating grin. Sanzo shot the man a nasty glare. “Your crew is fine, in case you were wondering, all of them up and whining. Your bed-warmer too.”
“He’s awake?”
“Wow, you actually have feelings? I think I just won- Wait, I’m gonna need a computer to add all of what I might just have won.”
“I’m gonna kill you,” Sanzo said, in between bites of chocolate.
“Love you too, precious. But seriously. Your crew is good. Better than you, in any case. Your bed-warmer, who is cute, by the way, if a little young, is also better than you. And you’re not so bad. So in conclusion, you are a lucky bunch.”
“What are you doing here?”
Duo smiled and ducked his head. “I took to the life on the go. I have my own ship now. Well, almost my own. We caught your signal.”
“Yaone said nothing was in range.”
“There’s a story to that. I have cloaking devices. Hell of a lot of them, in fact.” Duo looked at Sanzo critically. “Ready to rejoin the world of the living? I can help you out.”
Sanzo glared. He was gripping the edge of the table in an effort not to swoon. “Like I need your help.”
“You know, pride makes lousy food and even worse crutches.” Duo was regarding him seriously. Sanzo glared at him and let go of the table. He was pleased to discover he was standing confidently. The haze he woke up to was dissipating, however slowly, taking the headache along. He suspected he will be fine in a matter of hours.
“I’m fine,” he conceded gruffly.
Duo beamed. “Thought as much.”
“Why the pearls of wisdom then?”
“That’s my job. Pay is shit, but the moral high-ground, man, don’t let me get started.” Duo tugged at his collar and grinned again.
“Shoot me if I ever do.”
“My pleasure.”
“What happened?”
“We managed to get your signal. Found you drifting. You were very lucky – you specifically. Your crew still had maybe an hour, you were down to minutes. Someone up there is looking out for you.”
“We’re in space. There’s no up,” Sanzo said flatly. His voice echoed in the empty cargo hold.
“I meant that metaphorically.”
“I didn’t know atheist catholic was an option for you lot.”
“Laugh it up, if you will.”
“I will.”
“I hate your guts.”
“Likewise.”
“Anyway, like I was saying. Your crew is fine, an hour or so of oxygen inhalation fixed them right up. Your boy, he was up in fifteen. Impressive, that.”
“You have no idea.”
“I also noticed that your medic was, shall we say, unusually preoccupied with his health. Obsessively, I would say.”
“And now you know about as much as me.”
“Hey, don’t fault me for being surprised! When I last saw you, you had the social capacity of a piranha in a tank of lamb chops. Now you’re engaged in a romantic quadrangle.”
If Sanzo was drinking, he would have choked. “A what?”
“That red-headed companion is totally into your medic. And, judging by the content of his comments, totally into you.”
“The whore lived? So much for luck.”
“Ah, my kind of guy. I knew I was gonna like him,” Duo said. Then he shook his head. “You were unconscious for five hours. Your medic – Hakkai, was it – says there ought to be no damage. Apparently, you didn’t get the chance to lack oxygen. Says you might be a little mucked up for a while, s’all. Then of course he turns around and goes back to poking at that kid.” He paused at the end of the hold. The door was open.
“Some saviour you are. I’m gonna shoot myself any minute, out of sheer despair.”
“Dude, I’m not the saviour. I was set to work for him, but we didn’t really click and I wasn’t hired.” Duo smiled again, widely, and stepped off West into a bright corridor of an unfamiliar ship. “Welcome to my little baby. Her name is Twelve.”
“Twelve?” Sanzo raised a brow. “What kind of a moron calls his ship Twelve?”
“I know it’s not a cigarette brand, so doesn’t match your standards, but I find it suitable.”
“Freak.”
“Bitch.”
The silence that followed the insult exchange was companionable, surprisingly enough. Sanzo found Duo’s presence oddly relaxing, which was probably the only reason the fucked-up priest still managed to hold on to his own teeth. Well, that and the fact that he could fight like the devil himself. Dirty, underhanded, but fearfully effective. Sanzo still wondered how he managed to be that effective with a braid long enough to serve as a leash.
Sanzo’s arrival in the spacious common area was greeted enthusiastically. Sanzo stopped and wondered if he got onto the right ship.
“Did you give them anything? I need them sober,” he whispered to Duo, as Lirin flew of the couch she was curled on, wrapped her arms around him (pinning his arms to his sides) and bounced back, avoiding the swat aimed at her head.
“No. But there is some sort of a fuzzy demon spawn running about, everyone’s under the impression you can handle it,” the man replied, grinning. Yet again. Sanzo had no idea why he was in such a good mood.
An appraisal of his crew yielded positive results: everyone was in working order. Lirin was chirpy, as only she could whilst munching on heavily processed protein-based candy bar, Kougaji was relaxed in his soldiery manner, Yaone was inspecting a piece of sophisticated equipment lying on the table, and Jien was eating another candy bar, albeit with a great deal less enthusiasm. Gojyo was flirting. Sanzo spared another five seconds to make sure the whore was in working order – Gojyo flirted even when he was half-dead. Hakkai was talking to Gojyo, so he was probably flirting as well, although every once in a while he would look down, to the luxurious carpet, pretty much in tune with the other five. Not that Sanzo blamed them. It was a nice carpet. And Goku was sitting in the middle of it, cross-legged, scratching Kouryuu’s belly. At least the fuzzy demon spawn remark made sense.
Goku, for his part, looked like nothing had ever been wrong. His eyes were bright and lucid, his mouth curved in a wide smile. He looked up as Sanzo appeared and smiled wider. Sanzo snorted in reply and made his way to the coffee table, where a pot of coffee was calling his name. He poured himself a cup and found a free chair.
He’d managed to flip the universe the finger yet again.
Fess up - who didn't see him coming? Next chapter: more snark.
It seemed to be almost as cold inside as it was outside, and given that they were in space, it was pretty goddamn cold. Breathing was noticeably more difficult, even now. No one struggled yet, but there was a difference. Sanzo finally relented an fetched himself another sweater, and a couple of heavy blankets, one to dump on the moron still sleeping on his bed, and the other to bundle Kouryuu up. The cat didn’t struggle when he wrapped the thick material around him. This, if nothing else, finally drove the point home: they were going to die, and there was nothing he could do. If his insane kitten was allowing himself to be handled like a newborn, all hope had to be lost.
Sanzo snorted. He scratched Kouryuu’s ears lightly as he walked to the common area, where the lot of them had gathered to hear the last words, and threw the meowing bundle into Lirin’s arms. Idiot cat.
“Do we know how much air we have left?” he asked turning to Yaone.
“Five to six hours,” she answered worrying a datapad in her hands. A string of callous calculations shone dimly between her fingers. “A little more in the shuttles, but not much. An hour more, maybe. If we separate.”
“Why can’t we use the shuttles to go somewhere?” Gojyo asked. For once he was serious, though it was hard not to be, when confronted with the perspective of slowly asphyxiating to death in a freezer. His arms were crossed against his chest, hands hidden in too long sleeves. The too-big sweater had to belong to Jien – as much as everything about Gojyo annoyed Sanzo, he knew the certified companion didn’t have colourless, shapeless pieces of clothing in his wardrobe. Stupid of him, really, since these were usually warmest.
“Shuttles aren’t like a ship,” Jien told him. “They only use the air West produces. And they don’t have enough power to get anyone anywhere, from here. Not enough to get help.”
“Cheerful. So, what’s the plan?”
“I would recommend praying,” Sanzo said, leaning against the wall. He was aching for a cigarette even more than usual, which was only reasonable since now more than ever he couldn’t have one. “But that never helps. Our best chance is to get onto the shuttles, fly off, and try to signal from there. How much fuel do the shuttles have, anyway?”
“Not much. Or- at all. I had to use it up to keep the computers running,” Lirin said. She was looking at the floor, clutching Kouryuu to her chest. “A little of West’s fuel went with the blow, not much, but the fuel lines are jammed.” Her voice was steady, but there was a hint of tears close to the surface.
Sanzo reached out and slid his hand through her hair, fast enough to make it seem like a whack. He didn’t fool anyone. “Sucks to be us,” he said. “At least we can send a message.” Lirin curled in on herself some more. “Is the damage repairable?”
“Oh, yes,” Lirin nodded quickly. “Didn’t damage nothing. Not much. I can have her running in a couple of hours, if I get the parts.”
Sanzo nodded at her and turned to Gojyo. “Gojyo, you weren’t in your shuttle just now?” Seeing the red-head shake his head Sanzo went on, “The air supply should be relatively unaffected. And, it ought to be warmer. Give it another couple of hours here and move to the shuttles. Three in each, arrange yourselves to your hearts’ content.”
That got him universal attention.
“Three? Who are we supposed to leave?” Lirin was looking at him with wide, frightened eyes.
Sanzo shrugged. “Me, obviously. Ship is mine and I’m keeping it.”
“So, am I officially captain then?” Kougaji asked, laying a hand on Yaone’s shoulder.
“Are you fucking kidding?” Sanzo had a very definite opinion on many a subject. His unquestioned captaincy was chief among them.
“I’m shocked. Whatever happened to ‘if I die, you’re the captain of this boat’, captain?” Kougaji asked, his face perfectly straight.
Sanzo gave him a look. “Did I at any point imply that as an option? Ever? I die, you launch her and blow her to pieces.”
Kougaji allowed a low chuckle to escape his mouth. “So who’s the other lucky person?” he asked calmly.
“Goku.” Sanzo’s sharp eyes found Hakkai’s expression most interesting.
“I really must protest,” the good doctor said, perfectly calm. He was sitting beside Gojyo, prim and proper, as if it was another safety lecture and not their final moments. He even managed to make a blanket around his shoulders look dignifying.
“Protest all you want, but I will knock you out if you end up using too much air.”
“Goku is my responsibility.”
“He is also unconscious and ill.” Hakkai opened his mouth, but Sanzo didn’t allow him to speak. “This is not open for debate. You’re going. He’s staying.” The underlining threat was very clear. Besides, Hakkai must have realised that, being unconscious, Goku would last longer than Sanzo, possibly longer than any of them. But he must have realised that better than anyone, Sanzo thought uncharitably. No better endurance training than training with reduced oxygen levels.
“You know, if you wanted to get the kid alone, it’s not like we were particularly keen on getting in your way, Sanzo.” Gojyo pulled another of his knowing smiles from his endless arsenal onto his face.
“Fuck off,” Sanzo said without much spite. Everyone smiled, however thinly, which raised his hackles a little. He was not a travelling show.
“Just stating the obvious.”
Sanzo turned his back to him. “Don’t waste air talking. Make yourselves useful. Yaone, you try and push the signal as far as you can. Lirin, you make sure nothing else blows.” He ignored the faint “nothing left to explode”. “And I want the list of people who sold us the faulty parts, as I am gonna kill them, as soon as I can. Hakkai, you see to Lirin and Goku.”
“Not much else I can do for either. Lirin will be fine. The burns are superficial,” the doctor said in that cool, collected tone of his. “Goku, I can frankly say I have no idea where to start.”
Sanzo gave Lirin a sceptic look. She smiled at him. The red smudges on her face stood out, despite her tanned skin, yet she didn’t seem to be in any pain. The marks glistened in the low light, radiating faint smell of ointment. “You look after Kouryuu,” he said to her. “Something happens to him, I’m gonna kill you dead.”
The young mechanic pouted. “Why me?” she whined, tugging the blanket around the cat so that the blanket kept the cold out and the claws in.
“See, I told you he was being too nice. Never accept candy from him ever again,” Kougaji told Lirin seriously.
“Sanzo, you bastard!” she cried.
Sanzo smirked, but the smirk disappeared soon enough. “Why are you lot still here? Get!”
Gojyo stood up. “What do I do?”
“You might want to join Kou and Jien in prayer, for all I care.” Sanzo turned around. “Shuttle lock up in two hours, starting now. You might want to start drawing lots.”
“Sanzo…” Kougaji started and fell silent.
“I gave you an order.” His mouth twisted in a smirk. “On your knees and pray. Try to minimise the amount of air you use.” The captain gave his crew one last look. Slowly, they started to drift out of the common area. Within minutes Sanzo was alone. He dropped to the couch and closed his eyes.
“Fuck you,” he said to the universe.
The two hour mark came and went. Sanzo, with his inborn tact and sentimentality, locked the shuttle doors behind his crew and went to his cabin. Goku was still sleeping soundly, just as he had three minutes previously, when Hakkai was persuaded to retreat to Gojyo’s shuttle with Jien. Sanzo stood over his occupied bed for a few moments. The monkey didn’t so much as stir.
The captain snorted at his own idiocy and returned to the common area. He poured himself a glass of whiskey and gulped it down. Calmer now, he settled on the couch again, bottle and glass in hand.
The signal was out. All that remained was to wait for a convenient miracle to pick it up.
xxx.XXX.xxx
Sanzo opened his eyes. It took much effort and the results were less than satisfying. There was an indefinable haze in his line of vision. He swatted at it, impatiently – he didn’t have time for bullshit, or weakness.
“Relax, dude,” the blur said. There was a hint of amusement in the almost disembodied voice. “You have until you can stand up on your own, I suggest you put the time to good use.”
Sanzo knew that voice. He also knew the voice shouldn’t be anywhere near him. He had trouble picking the reasons from the muddled depths of his brain, but he knew that much.
“The fuck?” he managed, proud when the words emerged without a slur.
“You’ll be groggy for a while. No offence, but West was a regular greenhouse. You oughta had some plants installed, maybe you’d have some oxygen then. I personally think a fern on the bridge would improve your feng shui.”
He remembered now why the voice shouldn’t be anywhere near him. It provoked violence.
“Duo. What the fuck?” The haze was dissolving, leaving behind a headache, a grinning face and a very familiar infirmary. He was flat on his back, maybe a meter above the floor. There was a transparent mask on his face. He took a deep breath and tore it off. Very carefully he let the air out, and breathed in.
Air. Oxygen. Miracles did happen.
“So glad you remember me, captain. I just saved your sorry ass. What’s my prize?”
“Keeping your teeth.” Tentatively, but making an effort to appear as though he wasn’t trying to be careful, Sanzo sat up. “Shit.”
“You were badly fucked. I got the engine fixed – some luck there, at least. I had a spare converter and an expansion valve. Fuel lines were fried, Lirin and I fixed them up real nice. I’ll send you my half of the bill,” Duo said, handing Sanzo a chocolate bar and a couple of pills. “Have some chocolate with your aspirin, it’d do you good. You look like you went skiing in Hell.”
“Fuck you.”
“Thanks for the offer, but no.” Again with the infuriating grin. Sanzo shot the man a nasty glare. “Your crew is fine, in case you were wondering, all of them up and whining. Your bed-warmer too.”
“He’s awake?”
“Wow, you actually have feelings? I think I just won- Wait, I’m gonna need a computer to add all of what I might just have won.”
“I’m gonna kill you,” Sanzo said, in between bites of chocolate.
“Love you too, precious. But seriously. Your crew is good. Better than you, in any case. Your bed-warmer, who is cute, by the way, if a little young, is also better than you. And you’re not so bad. So in conclusion, you are a lucky bunch.”
“What are you doing here?”
Duo smiled and ducked his head. “I took to the life on the go. I have my own ship now. Well, almost my own. We caught your signal.”
“Yaone said nothing was in range.”
“There’s a story to that. I have cloaking devices. Hell of a lot of them, in fact.” Duo looked at Sanzo critically. “Ready to rejoin the world of the living? I can help you out.”
Sanzo glared. He was gripping the edge of the table in an effort not to swoon. “Like I need your help.”
“You know, pride makes lousy food and even worse crutches.” Duo was regarding him seriously. Sanzo glared at him and let go of the table. He was pleased to discover he was standing confidently. The haze he woke up to was dissipating, however slowly, taking the headache along. He suspected he will be fine in a matter of hours.
“I’m fine,” he conceded gruffly.
Duo beamed. “Thought as much.”
“Why the pearls of wisdom then?”
“That’s my job. Pay is shit, but the moral high-ground, man, don’t let me get started.” Duo tugged at his collar and grinned again.
“Shoot me if I ever do.”
“My pleasure.”
“What happened?”
“We managed to get your signal. Found you drifting. You were very lucky – you specifically. Your crew still had maybe an hour, you were down to minutes. Someone up there is looking out for you.”
“We’re in space. There’s no up,” Sanzo said flatly. His voice echoed in the empty cargo hold.
“I meant that metaphorically.”
“I didn’t know atheist catholic was an option for you lot.”
“Laugh it up, if you will.”
“I will.”
“I hate your guts.”
“Likewise.”
“Anyway, like I was saying. Your crew is fine, an hour or so of oxygen inhalation fixed them right up. Your boy, he was up in fifteen. Impressive, that.”
“You have no idea.”
“I also noticed that your medic was, shall we say, unusually preoccupied with his health. Obsessively, I would say.”
“And now you know about as much as me.”
“Hey, don’t fault me for being surprised! When I last saw you, you had the social capacity of a piranha in a tank of lamb chops. Now you’re engaged in a romantic quadrangle.”
If Sanzo was drinking, he would have choked. “A what?”
“That red-headed companion is totally into your medic. And, judging by the content of his comments, totally into you.”
“The whore lived? So much for luck.”
“Ah, my kind of guy. I knew I was gonna like him,” Duo said. Then he shook his head. “You were unconscious for five hours. Your medic – Hakkai, was it – says there ought to be no damage. Apparently, you didn’t get the chance to lack oxygen. Says you might be a little mucked up for a while, s’all. Then of course he turns around and goes back to poking at that kid.” He paused at the end of the hold. The door was open.
“Some saviour you are. I’m gonna shoot myself any minute, out of sheer despair.”
“Dude, I’m not the saviour. I was set to work for him, but we didn’t really click and I wasn’t hired.” Duo smiled again, widely, and stepped off West into a bright corridor of an unfamiliar ship. “Welcome to my little baby. Her name is Twelve.”
“Twelve?” Sanzo raised a brow. “What kind of a moron calls his ship Twelve?”
“I know it’s not a cigarette brand, so doesn’t match your standards, but I find it suitable.”
“Freak.”
“Bitch.”
The silence that followed the insult exchange was companionable, surprisingly enough. Sanzo found Duo’s presence oddly relaxing, which was probably the only reason the fucked-up priest still managed to hold on to his own teeth. Well, that and the fact that he could fight like the devil himself. Dirty, underhanded, but fearfully effective. Sanzo still wondered how he managed to be that effective with a braid long enough to serve as a leash.
Sanzo’s arrival in the spacious common area was greeted enthusiastically. Sanzo stopped and wondered if he got onto the right ship.
“Did you give them anything? I need them sober,” he whispered to Duo, as Lirin flew of the couch she was curled on, wrapped her arms around him (pinning his arms to his sides) and bounced back, avoiding the swat aimed at her head.
“No. But there is some sort of a fuzzy demon spawn running about, everyone’s under the impression you can handle it,” the man replied, grinning. Yet again. Sanzo had no idea why he was in such a good mood.
An appraisal of his crew yielded positive results: everyone was in working order. Lirin was chirpy, as only she could whilst munching on heavily processed protein-based candy bar, Kougaji was relaxed in his soldiery manner, Yaone was inspecting a piece of sophisticated equipment lying on the table, and Jien was eating another candy bar, albeit with a great deal less enthusiasm. Gojyo was flirting. Sanzo spared another five seconds to make sure the whore was in working order – Gojyo flirted even when he was half-dead. Hakkai was talking to Gojyo, so he was probably flirting as well, although every once in a while he would look down, to the luxurious carpet, pretty much in tune with the other five. Not that Sanzo blamed them. It was a nice carpet. And Goku was sitting in the middle of it, cross-legged, scratching Kouryuu’s belly. At least the fuzzy demon spawn remark made sense.
Goku, for his part, looked like nothing had ever been wrong. His eyes were bright and lucid, his mouth curved in a wide smile. He looked up as Sanzo appeared and smiled wider. Sanzo snorted in reply and made his way to the coffee table, where a pot of coffee was calling his name. He poured himself a cup and found a free chair.
He’d managed to flip the universe the finger yet again.
Fess up - who didn't see him coming? Next chapter: more snark.
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no subject
Date: 2007-04-12 11:50 pm (UTC)I loved this chapter! It was a nice surprise, and I have to say that I love the way they were teasing Sanzo about Goku. You know he's already got it bad for him. XD Hurray for 39 love! *waves flag*
Now I'm really addicted. *sighs* I can't wait to see what you've got in store for us next time! Yay snark!
*hugs Keiran-chan*
no subject
Date: 2007-04-13 04:39 pm (UTC)Sanzo managed to pretend he has no feelings for so long, that when he finally shows interest in someone, it's fit to be on the galaxy news! 39 wins.
Thank you! *huggles* Didja see any of Firefly yet?
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Date: 2007-04-14 04:43 am (UTC)Yay! It's been so long since I've read good 1x2 stuff! It's going to be especially wonderful since it's crossing over with Saiyuki! *hearts* Brilliant! And the very idea of Sanzo and Heero interacting just makes me laugh...that's going to be a doozy.
Indeed! *laughs* Still. It made me fangirl heart happy.
no subject
Date: 2007-04-14 02:01 pm (UTC)I'm still reading stuff on LJ and MLs, occasionally. Merula, for instance, has a heapload of hilarious real world GW/Saiyuki drabbles, in which Sanzo and Duo are cousins. I might have done a sketch for it at some point. Sadly, Meru's journal is friends only.
Yay! I win!
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Date: 2007-04-15 01:47 am (UTC)That's a shame. *sighs* Oh well. I guess you'll just have to tell me about it. *winks*
You do win. *hands you a prize* You're so cute! *huggles*
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Date: 2007-04-13 01:03 am (UTC)*huggles Duo* you just couldn't resist could you. Will Heero be making an appearance? I'd love to see him interactinc with the crew.
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Date: 2007-04-13 04:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-18 02:26 pm (UTC)*hand over face* He trusts the cat's instincts more than his own sometimes...
“Did I at any point imply that as an option? Ever? I die, you launch her and blow her to pieces.”
*snicker* That's Sanzo, all right. If he ever passes the scripture to anyone, it'll be something to see. He'll probably die and let the thing take care of itself.
Sanzo's going to kill the parts people. *chuckle* Facing imminent death, he's still planning on killing people.
*snicker* The fern on the bridge. I think Sanzo's feng shui is a lost cause.
I love the whole conversation between Sanzo and Duo, but the bed-warmer bit and the 'how much did I win...?' just cracks me up every time I read it.
“Dude, I’m not the saviour. I was set to work for him, but we didn’t really click and I wasn’t hired.”
Love the line. And Twelve. And the part about Duo's fighting style and the braid.
*chuckle* Sanzo needs them sober. After something like that, he's wondering why they're happy to see him. Social skills. He needs a set of those.
no subject
Date: 2007-07-18 06:41 pm (UTC)I think Sanzo's feng shui is a part of his problem. And of course he would kill people who sold him parts that blew up. They deserve it!
XD I was trying to get Solanum to write a Duo/Sanzo lemony fic. I think it might be hilarious. And Duo was designed to snark, I swear.
Sanzo really needs Psychology 101 to interact with people on a basic level. One wonders whether he was raised by trolls, he is so perceptive.
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Date: 2007-07-18 07:04 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-18 07:37 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-18 07:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-01-26 03:52 pm (UTC)Loved it though! I worship your ability for writing snark. I swear, awesome XD
Oh and Sanzo taking an extra few secs to check on Gojyo and why... BWAHAHAHA XD
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Date: 2008-01-26 07:56 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-15 06:32 pm (UTC)I was in love with the fic after chapter one and now I'm completely obsessed. OMFG, Duo ROCKS!!! you combined three of my favorite fandoms into one and now i'm going to be squeeling randomly for the rest of the day.
oh, love that Duo's ship is called "Twelve." now i'm just waiting for Heero to appear and make my life complete. ^_^
no subject
Date: 2008-05-16 09:40 pm (UTC):) Juuuust keep reading.